Thank you for writing this and sharing your story with your family member. There are so many of us who have toxic in-laws. I have been struggling with them for 25 years. My mother in law is a PITA and even at 80, doesn't shut up. She still tries to control every single holiday. She doesn't like me and never has. It is demoralizing to deal with such a person for so many years. These days, I avoid her as much as humanly possible.